Why Do It?

Its been on my mind a lot these last few weeks, and I've been hoping that it would just go away. But it has not, ugh!

 

So, here goes - Judging. 

Judging other mothers.

Being judged by other mother

I know I'm not the only one that has done this, or felt this way. If your a mom I'm sure - just assuming - that you've felt this way one point in time or another. 

One, or both of these ways. 

Its not hard to do. 

 

 If your an 'expert' of something you know that subject matter like no one else. Thats why your the 'expert' on it. You spend all your time learning, and being consumed w/ that subject matter. Others come to you b/c of what you know and maybe even ask what to do. 

So that brings me to the topic of todays post. 

If your a mom, you know more about your children than anyone and, I think, that makes you a type of 'expert' on child rearing. And if your anything like me, you might even look @ other mothers and think 'wow, shes a great mom! I should do that' or 'what is she thinking?! Thats an awful way to handle that' 

You might be on the flip side of that, you might be the one receiving those kind thoughts, or even worse, words. 

I know I've been on both sides of this. I know its wrong of me to pass judgment on others, especially others moms, I know how hard and trying and exhausting this job can be! We, as women, mothers, and christians - if that applies to you - should be encouraging, supporting and sharing w/ one another. Not passing judgment on how bad of a job each other are doing. Especially when we know how hard it is to be mothers. Who needs added stress, and really, when we talk about or create ideas and thoughts about one other, even when keeping those thoughts to ourselves, its hurting us. Judgment and gossip go hand in hand. I know, I'm guilty of both. 

Comparing, Judging, Gossip - I thought these things were just issues I dealt w/ in high school. I thought once I 'grew up' got married, had children, started my life that they would go away, kind of like the pimples I use to get. But nether one has gone away, and really the whole judging, comparing things have only gotten worse I think. 

 

You want to be the best mom you can, and you want to give your children everything. You want to be a great wife, and looking good. And just when you think you've made it, you look around and realize that you're nowhere close. You look around and see other moms who look great, and who are doing a great job, or who are doing things that you don't understand or don't get. So you create your own ideas about her and what a good, or bad, job shes doing.

I know - I do this! Its pathetic, and sad, and gets me no where.

 

 

Why?

Why do I do this? I know how hard it is,  I have 2 little ones under the age of 3. I'm a stay at home mom. I know! So why? Why, create ideas and assumptions about other moms who I do, or don't know, and make things harder, and fill my thoughts w/ contempt if I know how it is? We are all doing the best we can, I want to do a better job at just being a wife, and mother - I really don't have time for these other silly things, games. . . .

This is a huge area for me, I work on it daily. I'd like to say that maybe one day I'll grow out of it, but I have a feeling that its going to be around for a while. Its a daily choice to make, and a daily prayer - Lord, take this from me. Allow me to be thankful for what I do have. B/c really all I'm doing, by holding on to and running these things over and over in my mind, is steeling from my own family and relationships.

If this is an area for you, how do you deal w/ it? What helps/hinders you?